Tag: bumpass

AP News Release: Christmas Close to Cancellation

Yes, Virginia, Christmas could be cancelled this year.  

The AP, that is the Arctic Press News Service, is reporting that Santa Claus may have to cancel Christmas in America this year. According to elf sources within Santa’s North Pole secretive Headquarters, the office responsible for obtaining all of Santa’s travel visas to enter countries around the world has yet to obtain a U.S. entry Visa. 

Delays mount as Mr. Claus, according to one elfian source, must submit decades worth of social media posts. Santa’s repeated travels to such shit hole countries such as Somalia, Nigeria, and South Africa have also raised suspicions by terrorism experts Moe, Larry, and Curly at Homeland Security’s Office of North Pole Counter Terrorism (ONPCT) along with his use of multiple aliases, according to the same source.  

Although, the Department of State’s press office said if Santa was travelling to see Afrikaners in South Africa, that was acceptable.  They also denied Trump demanded Santa buy $10 million in Trump family bitcoin memes before being issued a visa.  

Those familiar with negotiations between Santa and the Department of State, report that the Secretary is demanding that only American children receive gifts, and children born to non-U.S. parents must not receive presents; that Santa must provide a list of the immigration status of all children that receive presents as proof. Santa continues to refuse these demands, it is said.

Moreover, The Secretary apparently ordered his staff to check Santa’s social media posts twice, and said, it is reported, that he won’t let a ‘woke’ Santa Claus travel to the United States or its territories.

Further mudding Santa’s travel plans to America; the Secretary of Homeland Security is reported to have formed an anti-Santa ICE task force group in what has been dubbed ‘Operation Clear and Present Danger,’ according to transcripts of a leaked cabinet meeting video.   The Secretary adding, that ‘if that red suited red baiting groomer of young children lands’ in America he’s going to end up being deported to an El Salvadoran prison.  “No Habeas Corpus for that woke Mother F*#@r.’

Additionally, the Secretary of War, per a leaked Signal Chat, declared during a situation room meeting after ordering new death squad strikes on more Venezuelans, that ‘if that Tre de Aragua terrorist Santa crossed into Venezuelan airspace he will be ‘swimming with the fishes’ and any surviving reindeer ‘would be hit with a second strike.’  A short video attached to the leaked Signal chat appeared to show a ‘Franklin the Turtle’ coloring book next to the Secretary, who doodled with crayons while an admiral briefed in the background.

Furthermore, in a deleted segment of a recent 60-minutes interview obtained by the AP, Trump is reported to have said that he isn’t on Santa’s List, and that he never knew Santa or travelled to the North Pole on his sleigh or engaged in inappropriate relationships with underage elf.  

Trump even indicated his desire to annex the North Pole, saying, ‘they love me there, they really do.’  ‘I am really popular among the Elves,’ adding, ‘I would have been elected Santa Clause but the election was stolen by dirty, sleepy, fatso Kris Kringle.’  ‘His wife’s nice,’ he continued, ‘but not my type.’ ‘Once she said I was a sore loser, it told her quiet, quiet piggy.’  He even teased renaming the North Pole, Trumplandia and changing Christmas to Trumpmas.

To complicate things even more, Trump secretly imposed a 2000 percent tariff on all presents brought into America manufactured in North Pole workshops, per a leaked confidential White House decision paper last spring.  Santa’s Office of Legal Counsel — the Office of Legal Clause — filed suit – in a rare writ of dies natalis Christi — challenging what it termed punitive and ‘illegal tariffs’ in June, but the Supreme Court, in a shadow docket ruling issued at three this morning sided with Trump, overturning an appeals court ruling to stay the tariffs until December 26.

Merry Christmas America.

A New “Remedy:” America’s Social Contract Under Siege

America floundered after the Revolution ended.  A confederation of sovereign states jealously guarding their individual prerogatives, bickering constantly, the central government virtually powerless.  The Articles of Confederation was a disaster.  

In 1786 commissioners from five states met in Annapolis, ostensibly to discuss trade between the states and international trade relationships.  Among the 12 in attendance were James Madison and Alexander Hamilton.  They apparently did not accomplish much, but they did agree to meet the following year in Philadelphia, this time inviting commissioners from all the states.  The stated purpose of the convention was not to develop a new form of government, however, that was precisely what James Madison, among several others, intended.  The convention was to create a new social contract between the people and the states and save the union.

The Philadelphia Convention gathered on May 14, 1787. After waiting for more delegates to arrive they got down to business, debating and agreeing on the rules of Convention.  On May 29th Edmund Randolph of Virginia “opened the main business” of the Convention.  Speaking to the “crisis,” that is the failure of the Articles of Confederation, and “prophecies of the American downfall,” he proposed four objectives “to revise the federal system.  We ought to “inquire 1. into the properties, which such a government ought to possess.  2. The defects of the confederation. 3. the danger of our situation& 4. The remedy.”

That ‘remedy’ has withstood the test of change since the Constitution was adopted by the States in 1789. Two hundred and thirty-six years.  The Constitution was and is not perfect, in fact it was not designed to be infallible, like a religious text proclaiming the word of God.  It was made by humans for humans, and they had the wisdom to recognize that things, well, change.   A Bill of Rights was added early, critical amendments were enacted over the decades.  Slavery was finally abolished (although after 96 years of relentless brutality), African Americans and women won the right to vote, birthright citizenship.   It is the social contract that endures and keeps us bound to one another. It’s what makes us American.

That remedy, that social contract, our Constitution is at risk.  Day after day the current administration attacks America’s social contract.  Executive orders rain down like hail stones, crushing the tender plants in our garden of democracy. If anything, they are messages to his base, a veneer of action, but they are also projecting the America he wants and the social contract he envisions. It isn’t a pretty one.

What happens when his attempts at changing the Constitution through fiat fails.  The Supreme Court says, “no.”  What then?  I doubt he will retreat; he will fight.  One way to fight is to organize a new constitutional convention, a new remedy, a new social contract. Can you imagine Georgia’s delegate being Marjorie Taylor Greene? 

Will our most cherished rights disappear into the ether?  Replaced by an authoritarian social contract?  Emojis of flags and flames and fists. If the convention meets and writes a new constitution, I suspect It will fundamentally alter our relationship to the government, and not in a good way.   

If Trump’s executive orders are a guide, a new social contract will eschew separation of powers, in its place a powerful executive, with unlimited terms.  King like.  Gone will be an independent judiciary, replaced by a Supreme Court appointed by the President, serving at his will. Gone will be the House of Representatives and a Senate, replaced by a unicameral body elected by state representatives, a rubber stamp affair.  A state religion declared.  A Christian religious test to hold office.  Separate but equal codified.

Don’t forget about The Bill of Rights and all amendments that will be nullified. Do you see them offering robust press freedoms?  Protecting you from unreasonable searches and seizures.? What about jury trial, or right to counsel.  Do you see that being in the new social contract?  I see the curtailment of rights, women’s right in particular.   Same sex marriage banned, access to contraception gone (Recall Justice Thomas’ call for cases), homosexuality criminalized.  The list of rights rescinded would go on and on.  It wouldn’t be a positivist social contact it would be negativist one, restricting rights not establishing rights.  It won’t be a mixed government of the one, the few, the many.  It will be the one. Is that an America you can live in?

That’s the social contract I see down the road if people stay at home, keep their heads down, and give in to Trumpian chaos and mayhem. Yes, reform is needed to get money out of the campaigns, stopping politicians from enriching themselves, keep the oligarchs from buying elections like Musk is now trying to buy the Wisconsin Supreme Court race, but a new federal system that gives up on democracy – the many — is not the ‘remedy.’  This new Trumpian social contract would be the opposite of reform, it would turn America not back to 1954 or 1859, or to 1789. It would transform America into an autocracy of one man rule..

This weekend, May 5th, there will be a rally at the Louisa Courthouse from noon to two.  Come have your voices heard.  Celebrate the 238th anniversary of the start of the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia.

Lost and Found: Where in the World is John McGuire

Yesterday, the House of Representative’s DOGE Subcommittee, chaired by Marjorie Taylor Greene, provided a WWE style smackdown of senior executives from National Public Radio and Public Broadcasting Service.  The usual theater, chair shots, kissing up to Fox News, bullying, the outcome preordained. 

John McGuire, Virginia’s 5th Congressional District Representative, and a member of the DOGE Subcommittee was nowhere in sight.  Maybe he was teleworking?  He did not make an appearance (from what I can tell) much less ask any questions.  In an almost 3-hour hearing you would expect him to show up and ask a question or two.  He didn’t.  Was he getting his nails done?  Maybe he was on some Signal group chat. The dais where the representatives lord over the witnesses was mostly empty throughout the hearing, although I must admit, that there were more chairs than members on the Subcommittee.

It was an important hearing.  It was federal funding life or death for NPR and PBS.  Looks like death.  If the Subcommittee had its way, according to Greene, they would never get another penny of taxpayers’ money.  McGuire, I suspect would agree with the Subcommittee’s sentiments.

What galls me is that federal workers have been excoriated for allegedly not showing up for work or being lazy or wasteful, by folks like McGuire.  Justification for purging tens of thousands from federal government payrolls. The usual claptrap.  So, where was he on Wednesday?  My tax dollars, and your tax dollars, pay his salary, and I expect and demand him to put in the time and show up for committee hearings, ask questions when important issues are being discussed.

Please call or write Mr. McGuire and ask where the hell he was yesterday and why wasn’t he at the hearing to ask questions.  Finally, tell him to support NPR and PBS if you are so inclined.